Monday, January 26, 2015

They call me Niffer

With my blog carrying the name, it might come as a surprise to you that very very few people have actually had the privilege of calling me Niffer.

The nickname first appeared in high school when I was in a class that had 8 or 9 Jennifers in the same classroom. Some boy, who shall remain nameless simply because I don't remember who he was, decided we all needed nicknames. He assigned us names like Nif, Iffer, Jen, Jenna, Jenni, and of course Niffer.

It didn't really stick with anyone with the exception of one kind soul named Cary. Cary was dating my mother at the time (and happens to be with her again now) and he was an amazing part of my teenage years. Cary had a joyful youthful character and I believe he played a bigger part in building my outlook on life than perhaps anyone else. Cary was the first person to call me Niffer and I loved him for it.

It was because of Cary that the nickname became a name of endearment, and to this day my husband calls me Niffer. Every time Michael says "Because that's what Niffers like the best" or "I love my Niffer" my heart bursts with feelings of really truly being loved. My husband can say "I love you" 100 times and it would never feel as genuine as when he says "I love my Niffer."

Aside from Cary and Michael, there is only one other person who calls me Niffer. His name is Vince. Vince is an ex from my past but he is the only one I think of fondly. And tonight, I happen to have dinner with him. I hadn't seen him in nearly 15 years. It made me smile to see him again.

I hope that some time in the future, my girls get their heart broken by someone they never want to see or hear from again. It will help them appreciate those moments when life is truly good because you have a real connection. I can think of examples of broken hearts from my past that have made me appreciate my husband all the more.

But Vince is not one of them. Because of Vince, I also hope that my daughters fall in love with someone and part ways for no other reason than realizing they're not right for you. I think I will always think fondly of Vince and always hope the best for him. It makes my day whenever I see him and I feel like I'm walking on air for a while just knowing that he's happy and doing well. Like the exs who broke my heart, Vince makes me appreciate my husband all the more, but unlike the other exs, he does so in a way that reminds me of happy times rather than sad.

I hope my kids get to experience that feeling too. Life is good.

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